Idea 61 - Where My Rapier At?

One project that sounds really rewarding to me is updating Shakespeare for a younger generation that's deeply uninterested in it. The only problem is that I don't really know any Shakespeare, nor am I interested in boning up on it. Then again, since today's kids are probably as lazy as I am, they won't know if I make it up. I just need to make them feel like I understand the youth of today:

ROMEO:
Yo B -- I'm fixin' ta drop them Danish fools, for real, 'sept my sabre be all lost an' shit. Yo, I feel like my uncle's bitch-ass ghost done stole my shit! Fools dat do dat shit gotta get dropped, be they muthafuckin' deceased or not, you feel me?

MACBETH
Yo homes, you know I feel you -- you know dis. But you gotta know too, dat bitch is already muthafuckin' dead, yo! How you gonna drop a bitch dat already been dropped, B?

Wait, is this racist? I don't mean to be at all, but it's always pretty tough to tell with this stuff. What if I frame it as a commentary on racism, can I get away with it then? Mostly I just want to put the lingo I've learned from The Wire to good use.